I made these bad boys for LaTiffany! It’s a combination of any girls two favorite things: flowers and glitter.

Tiff and I right before our trip to Legends mall in KC.

No, I did not get this ugly, ugly dress.

Rule of thumb: All animals prints match regardless of the color or pattern.

I miss you, Zac!!!!!!

Okay…judging from this picture take a wild guess as to what I did today. OH MAN! I finally busted out my artsy stuff. I’ve been super sad because when I moved I accidentally left all my stamps, inks, and stickers at my parents house but today I decided I wouldn’t let that get me down anymore. As you can see, from the lower left corner and far right corner, I had the essentials going on: Diet Coke and music which all aided in the creation of:

Tah-dah! I am not sure who this will eventually belong to but when inspiration strikes I don’t ask questions. Also, I was playing with my camera and found out how to edit pictures. I added the little stars which makes it look extra dazzling. Isn’t it cute? Anyways, here’s another picture of some glass coasters I decorated a while back…

Okay on this picture I made it a little foggy everywhere but the heart. Thought it kind of looked cool…. You have no idea how happy I am I found the editing stuff on my camera. I totally love the sparkle/stars I put on the other pictures. Okay, Joe makes fun of me because every time I see a baby kitten I get all mushy. All I want to do it cuddle with it and why wouldn’t I want to? Kittens are so adorable. However, even after poking fun at me he still e-mails these to me:

Looks like to me if he didn’t want me to get all sappy over something so adorable he shouldn’t be taking pictures of them for me! Eventually I hope to have a kitten at my apartment….but that’s down the road. For now all I can do is be jealous of Joe for hogging all the kittens on his dads farm.

 ..

I’m finally all settled in here in Topeka! I started work last week, all my boxes are unpacked, and all the pictures are hung. I love it here. The traffic, the noise, the people, and the lights at night: It’s all exactly what I’ve been looking forward to. I know Topeka isn’t that big but it’s bigger than Salina so I love it!
Anyways, Joe came down to visit me this week, (It was about time!)
I miss everyone, though. It’s hard knowing that no matter where I go here in Topeka I wont know a single person whereas no matter where I went in Salina I knew at least a handful of people. It gets lonely at times but I am still having a blast. My roomie, Tiff, is the best ever and we keep each other entertained!

I don’t start work for another week so needless to say I’ve had a lot of time on my hands. So…yesterday I drew my tattoo. Like it?

I was watching P.S. I love you again today and there’s a line in there that really hit home for me: It doesn’t matter what job you have or what you do or don’t do. No matter what, without him, you’re alone.  (Him being your significant other) Totally true. I’ve always thought I’d be married by now. I had a plan. I was going to be married at 19 just like my mother, have my first child by the time I was 21, have a home with a man I love so dearly, and live the rest of my days taking care of babies.  Instead I’m 20, not married, not expecting my first child, working at a job I hate, and moving away from everyone I care about. Do I feel alone? Yeah, I do. Having a husband that loves me more than words can say, being the mother to his children, and making a house a home is so incredibly important to me. I’d take that ANY day over achieving a degree, having fancy money filled life, and fabulous career. I’d give that all up in a heartbeat. It’s not what I have in my life it’s who I have in my life. I know I have friends who care about me dearly, and don’t get me wrong I feel the same right back, but I know what it’s like to love someone so much it hurts. No amount of friends can replace that feeling. No amount of friends can make me feel as whole as I do when I know I am loved. I can stand in a crowded room, with family and friends surrounding me, and feel so alone because I know I won’t fall asleep to the rhythmic sound of Mr. Right breathing next to me. I know patience is a virtue but it’s one I’ve never had. I’m tired of waiting for the perfect man. I’ve been waiting since I was 12 and honestly I’m exhausted. The reason I’m not living my dream life isn’t because I don’t know what I want in a man. I know perfectly good and well what I want. I want to be treated like a friggen goddess and not just because he knows I want to be treated that way but because he honestly believes I deserve it. Maybe that’s slightly selfish of me but no one in my life has ever treated me that way and I sure as heck am NOT going to live the rest of my life unappreciated. However, I want him to know I am not perfect. I want him to see me at my worst and love me even more for it. Sure, I get cranky, moody, impossibly difficult, and stubborn. I PMS, throw fits, act childish, snore when I’m sick, drool on my pillow, puke after drinking 1 wine cooler, freak when I get bloody noses, nick myself shaving, wear sweat pants as much as I can get away with, complain about just about everything, get hormonal, crave weird foods, not get out of bed until I have to, hate being told what to do, and more often than not I look out for #1. I’m bossy sometimes, strong willed, and free spirited. I have a dysfunctional, hard to impress, and even harder to please family. I’m not saying I’m easy to love and I don’t come with baggage. Hey, when is love ever easy? But I expect my husband to be man enough to handle me and his loyalty, faithfulness, and love should never, EVER be in question. I’ve always been told I am way too forgiving so being able to love someone for EXACTLY who they are is not a problem for me but it’s hard to find someone who’s willing to do the same.
But anyways, here’s so me at 20 and not even close to being married. Baby, I know you’re out there and I love you already.

Chopping wood with daddy and Ethan!

I had probably the best day ever yesterday….or at least the best day in a long time. I watched P.S. I love you which is hands down the best movie I have ever, ever seen. ” I laughed. I cried. It moved me.” I don’t know what it is about Jerry, the guy that dies, but I’m pretty much in love with him. He’s adorable, funny, great body, and has that perfectly sexy accent. What more could a girl want?

I went bowling last night with five other people that I work with and oh my gosh was it the best time ever. I laughed until my stomach, lungs, and head hurt. Sandy got tipsy on one and a half beers, Kat chugged a pitcher, Joe was an hilarious drunk, Nick wore a tie, and Amanda danced every time she bowled no matter how good or bad she did. I had over four hours of fun for only like six bucks. I think only two of us scored over 100 during our three games. Needless to say, we sucked. But the people bowling next to us kept cheering us on and giving us high-fives even though they were professional bowlers. And when sandy chugged her one cup of beer they were laughing, screaming, and cheering right along with us. Man, it was crazy fun. June 26th at 7pm it’s all going down again. CANNOT wait.

Check out what I am going to watch tonight!!!!

Oh, I cannot wait…

Ahh!!! All my scrapbooking/sewing stuff is in boxes!!!! I am having withdraw symptoms because all my creativity is being caged in. I look at blogs of totally gorgeous things that other people have recently made and it makes me itch for a good afternoon of straight scrapbooking. When I move the first thing I am going to do is scrapbook like a crazy fool until I get my artsy fartsy fix. Check out my favorite layout I’ve ever done: Click Here!

 I was looking through my senior album the other day…This was the first real scrapbook I ever did. Love it! Not too shabby for a first..

Love this picture I took in Oklahoma!!!!

I cannot seem to fall asleep tonigt so I thought I’d steal a bit of time to update. Next week is dead week…I can’t believe it’s almost that time of the semester to take finals. Time just seems to be flying lately. I’ve gotten most of my projects done! Yahoo! I’m so glad it’s almost over….I just need to force myself to get through the next two weeks and it’ll be summer!!!

Anyways…I really need to get some sleep…

I love Taco Bell. Mmm…if ever I am in a bad mood stuff me full of soft taco’s and nachos and you can literally watch my mood dissipate.

          “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse nore will he harbor his anger forever, he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed his transgressions from us.”

It almost feels good to be back in my old room…these four familiar walls are comforting knowing that as long as I’m between them I don’t have to worry about anything. I cannot even begin to explain in enough words to make anyone understand how stressful, discouraging, draining, and challanging this year has been so far. It’s enough to make anyone want to throw in the towel.

If I were to sum up on one word what moving back home as been like I would have to say chaotic due to the fact that I’ve got so much to do and so little time. However, the actual move went pretty smooth and to the extent of my knowledge nothing was broken but of course I haven’t unpacked all the boxes.

Anyways, today is my beautiful mama’s birthday! She’s 42 years young but still looks 25. I love you, mama!

Sure fire sign I’m home:

Samuels war zone of toys are everywhere! I swear! I don’t know how many I’ve stepped on since I’ve been home…

This is my favorite spot in my parents house. I love sitting here in the morning listening to the birds singing or in the evening while the sun sets and throws a cascade of blood-red sunlight through the trees. Gorgeous.

Between my 25 page paper due Monday, my web page final project, the essay for Critical Thinking, making up homework and tests from being out of town, trying to get out of bed to make it to all my classes, working 30 hours, being out of town for 5 days, going out of town again tomorrow, and packing up my apartment to move on Sunday… I am beat. As soon as this lady gets out of bed in the morning I go go go until I fall asleep really late at night. This semester cannot end soon enough…

Anyway, this morning as I ran out to my car to get some boxes to try and pack a little I had to stop and notice the flowers that are sprouting in the flower pots on my patio. Thank God for sprouting flowers. They’re so tiny but full of hope because with every day that passes they’ll grow stronger and stronger. I hope I can be like that too….life can really stress me out but I hope and pray that with each passing day I grow stronger and stronger…

Tomorrow Tiff, her mother Jolene, and I are road trippin’ it to Topeka! Cannot wait! We’re leaving around like 9ish in the A.M. and probably wont get back until around 7:30pm….We’re touring apartments! YAY! I can’t believe it’s almost time to move. It’s about time.

The other day I was at work and a lady, Sharon, came in to the store to return a stroller from a baby shower registry. I asked if anything was wrong with the product or why she was returning it and she replied by saying the woman the shower was for never was pregnant! That lady made the whole story up due to hers chronic lying tendencies. Apparently, from what Sharon said the fake prego was a bigger lady in the first place so it was believable however she’s had a history of lying about big things like that before.

I was shocked…how could someone lie like that when they know full well that in nine months everyone will be furious due to the inability to produce a physical child! So many people spent money on the items listed on her registry…all for nothing. Sharon alone spent over $100 on that stroller! It almost infuriated me just hearing the story. Anyways, the only thing I could think of to do to help that chronic liar was to pray for her. She is going to have a rough life, although she is an adult, if she keeps up that sort of behavior without psychiatric help. Hopefully the people in her life recognize and understand she so obviously has a problem that requires help. I just hope she gets it.

I’m not sure why my teacher hates me but she does. It’s not like I try to make her life miserable…I just don’t understand what I’m doing! She makes me feel pretty dumb.
22. 5 pages to go on the paper I am writing! Yuck…and I have to submit it Saturday. Then my web site final project is due in a week…my essay for Critical Thinking is due in 1.5 weeks…the final project for MANG 366 is due soon and I’ve got homework and a couple tests to make up. This semester blows…

On a lighter note: The weather is GORGEOUS! And my flowers are sprouting!!!!!!!!!! I gave them a little love today….watered them…weeded….sung to them….they better not be ugly when they grow up.

I’M COMING HOME IN THE MORNING! I cannot wait!!!!!! I miss my bed, my shower, my couch, and my desk. The first thing I am going to do is kick my shoes off and crawl in to bed.

Joe and Josh. Stop reading my blog or I’ll break in to your house and flood your toilets. I know where you live.

Just playing.

…Maybe.

Bus rides suck. Best Westerns free breakfast sucks. The cold shower sucks. The wind sucks.
Other than all of that….I’ve had a pretty good time so far….I wont speak to fast though because we leave Sunday and it’s only Thursday.

I’m almost homesick. What a wuss.

 Alright, check out these bad boys. It was love a first sight. I’m developing a severe case of shoe fetish so now any type of peep toed, funky patterened, super jacked up high heel shoe I am totally down with.

It’s been so long since it’s been warm and sunny I think I’ve almost forgotten what spring feels like. The weather has been playing games but yesterday it was just plain gorgeous. So much so I sported a tank and flip-flops. With the windows down in my car, the radio blaring, and my shades on I soaked up the sun as much as I could because I knew that with the Kansas weather it surely would not last. I went home to my parents house making sure to take nothing but dirt roads just to give me an excuse to smell the country.  I watched my dad change the oil in my car only so I could be outside with my sleeves rolled up trying to feel the tingle of the sun on my skin. The grass is turning green in my parents yard and it got me thinking about how once I move to Topeka I’m never going to have the time to run home and mow. I love mowing. The smell of freshly cut grass  brings back so many memories. Memories like sunburns so bad it hurt to wear a shirt, our dog begging for attention during lazy summer days on the back patio, dad making hamburgers, and Samuel splashin around in his pool. I remember jogging down past the river listening to every sound nature had to offer. I’d sit on the ledge of the bridge with my legs kicked over the side watching the fish swim around in circles. I remember the dog wadding in the water until I kicked off my shoes, rolled up my pants and jumped in too. Man, I miss home. I miss sweating 24/7 in the summer because mom was always cold and would never, ever turn the AC on.  I miss watermelon, late night walks, lemonade, the smell of sunscreen, and shooting hoops with my brothers on the goal nailed up on the garage. Most of all I’m going to miss the wheat field behind my parents house. For ten summers I’ve watched them combine it down…and every summer for the last ten years I’ve always been sad to see it go.

I’m going to be SO homesick when I move.

P.S. Here’s a rockin’ picture I took of my daddy and his baby.

So both Meghan, a girl I work with, and I have miserable sore throats. It’s not the it-just-tingles-but-i’ll-be-okay type of sore throat….its the there-is-a-wounded-cat-trying-to-claw-it’s-way-out type of sore throat. Man, it hurts. I woke up this morning unable to swallow anything because it was so swollen. Ohh it hurts.

I’ve been sleeping in until noon just about every day this week….my body must be having a hard time. I usually wake up naturally around 8:30 a.m. but lately my body is like morning? there is a morning? try afternoon!

I’ve always poked fun at gamers saying that they must have nothing better to do with their lives than sit around and play video games but people I am here to tell you that Mario Kart rules. I’d never played before so I was making false assumptions due to the lack of hands-on experience but now that I am better informed I love it! However, I suck. A guy from work, Joe, came over last night with his old school Nintendo 64 and we played for hours…I never got better than 8th place (8th is last place…but saying 8th sounds better) …he always got 1st. (Stupid boy…) Anyhoo…I may play again tonight and I’m determined to at least get 4th place. Thats a 50% improvement rate….good enough for me.

Spring break is over which makes me really sad. I didn’t exactly do anything of interest but I did sleep in every day which scored major points. It felt good to really dedicate time to lounging around as opposed to constantly being at school or work. I did, however, take the time to go work out every morning which was a huge stress reliever. I jogged 2 miles a day and did some weights…I’ve never felt more energetic and I’ve been in such great moods. But now that my life is back to it’s usual grind I’m bound to get stressed out again. I’ve decided to work as close to full time as possible while still taking those stinkin’ 15 credit hours. I’ve got nearly $400 in taxed I owe the government so I should probably get on that.

Moving day is just around the corner, too! I cannot wait.

I just want the world to know that I don’t know what I would do without my two best friends. They’ve listened, advised, discussed, and empathized with all my drama in the past couple weeks so here’s to you two. Thank you for everything.

I’M GOING TO MANHATTAN TONIGHT. And boy and I excited!!!! This week has been rough so I need a little weekend get away. Anyway’s I’ll totally post pictures later.

Ever really think about what you really, really want out of your significant other? What are your expectations? Standards? Do you have any idea of what you want?

I do.

 Okay, here is that project  I promised. The flowers are rubber cupcake liners, the case a coffee cup, and the stems are just basic flower wire. I wish Target carried the mini-muffin rubber liners in the One-Spot but all I saw was these big ones. Think how cute the teenie ones would be. Love it!

What a beautiful day out today! I know, I know, it’s coldish, cloudy, and windy but I’m just so darn glad it’s not snowing/raining/sleeting or freezing out. I for one am ready for summer. I am usually a winter person but man oh man has this winter sucked. Talk about nasty weather. Oh how I long for the tingle of the sun on my skin, lazy summer nights, and BBQ!! I can’t wait to bust out my teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini and soak up some sun. Anyways, I’ve got to go take my Critical Thinking mid-term.

Alright, I was surfin’ through random blogs in the ‘ol word-press and wow some people write about such meaningful, thought out things. It kinda makes me feel like I have no stance or soap box on anything which I would like to prove wrong so here is my serious topic of the day: Special Olympics.

I volunteered this past weekend and ya know what? I have never been happier in my life than on Saturday from 8:00-11:00am when I helped score the “Pop-a-Shot” exercise. The participants were so proud to just be there that it almost brought tears to my eyes. They weren’t just proud of themselves but every other person there. If one person was shooting a basketball ten more participants were standing around cheering him/her on. It was encouraging to see how supportive everyone was. 
Anyways, I’m off to Martini’s.

Okay people today is a great day. All my classes were canceled and I don’t have to go to work! Talk about freedom. But I am going to a career fair today. Hopefully I’ll start me a little thing called a network which I have delayed on attaining due to the fact that Kansas State University/Salina sucks when it comes to interns, career awareness, job placement, or anything else related to that topic. I met with the career services lady, Lucy, (she’s the only staff member here that brings her A game) and she helped me revamp my resume so I am armed and ready when I go today. Look out world or you wont know what hit ya.

Anyways, I was up totally late last night working on a new artsy fartsy project which I will post about later. I would have taken pictures already except it was late when I finished it and this morning, well we’ll just say it like it is, I was too lazy. So look forward to that in the next day or so.
I was sitting around yesterday (haha like I have the time to really do that…I was actually supposed to be doing homework) and  I got to thinking that in three months I will be living in Topeka. How cool is that? I am so excited I may actually begin to lose sleep over it. You have no idea how bad I want to get out of Salina. And I was also thinking that in less than three months time I will have graduated with an Associates. I know that really isn’t a huge accomplishment but it seems like yesterday I graduated high-school. AND I was thinking (wow, this is a lot of brainpower) that in 2.5 years I’ll have a bachelor in Business Finance. How totally stinkin’ cool does that sound??

I am so board sitting here in class. Wanna see my new toy?

I totally love it! And oh how I have waited and waited to be able to afford it!

Anyway, I’ve been trying to lose some vanity pounds so I’ve been working out and taking…

but this pill gives me huge caffeine headaches. so I haven’t taken it today thinking my headache will go away but I feel so tired, lazy, and..you guessed it… I still have a huge headache.

Here is one of my newest projects! I love the paper! I also used a little bit of Creative Cafe.

For whatever reason this week has been very depressing…from bad dreams, work, and school everything is just bogging me down. Today is Valentine’s Day and I have only talked to Stace a total of 5 minutes. I’ll be at the school until 8:00pm so my Valentine’s Day is basically shot. I have a big test tonight in a class that is more than confusing and complicated. 
*Crosses fingers*
I don’t understand. I’ve been very good lately about taking my thryoid meds so why do I feel so emotional? It doesn’t take much for me to break down and have a mini episode filled with tears and woe’s. I could blame it on stress but I’ve always kept myself busy so this semesters schedule shouldn’t be accused. I don’t know what it is. My job, school, bills, and my crapy car are weighing me down plus added drama with my boyfriend. *sigh*

A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn’t even know
Now there’s a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay
I’ll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what’s at stake
I know that I’ve let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I’ll keep us together whatever it takes
I said “If we’re gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don’t hide the broken parts that I need to see”
I said “Like it or not it’s the way it’s gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me”
But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I’d be lost without you and never find myself
Let’s hold onto each other above everything else

 
Anyways, on a better note: I have A’s in 3 out of 5 of my classes! Yay!

Isn’t it beautiful??

To see where I got it Click Here

Tiff took this picture of me singin in the car on the way to Topeka on Saturday.

Okay so the whole point of the website is for scrap-booking stuff, right? Well, apparently I haven’t been holding up my end of the bargain. I have been soooo totally busy that I haven’t done anything for such a long time. BUT….have no fear….this Friday a good friend of mine is coming over and we’re going to scrapbook like crazy. We’re going to puke glitter on to everything, art’s and craft anything, and decorate whatever until our brains fall out. I’m excited.

(this was me before my fabulous hair cut)

Anyways, Salina was the thankful recipient of a wonderful, gorgeous, glittering million inches of snow this morning. (Sarcasm. It was not wonderful or gorgeous)  The streets are slick, people are crazy, my tires have no traction. Do the math. That’s right…I almost got into an accident which made me 20 minutes late for class this morning (I slept through my alarm which didn’t help that matter either) and when I walked through the class room doors no one was there. The teacher called a snow day. So I could have avoided near death, frantic dressing, wet hair, and bitter cold if only I had the Internet in my house so I could have seen if school was canceled.

So I am insanely early for my next class which has allowed me the opportunity to complete random homework. I chose not to seize that moment but instead update my site.

I had a tragic moment the other day when I tried to transfer all my pictures from my boyfriends computer to my flash-drive. I thought I did it correctly and then preceded to delete the shortcut off his desktop which, unbeknownst to me, doesn’t delete them completely from his computer. Anyways, I was on a computer at school trying to access the pictures on my flash-drive and they weren’t there. There was nothing, zilch, Nada, zero, n-o-t-h-i-n-g.

 I freaked.

And not only did I freak but I panicked. Later that day I explained my situation to Stace (my boyfriend) expecting him to feel sorry for me, possibly offer to check my flash-drive for himself, maybe give me a hug and tell me he’s sorry that happened to me. No, I got none of that. You know what I got? A laugh. And not just a laugh as in, “Man, that sucks” but it was a genuine laugh of, “Honey, you have got to be the dumbest woman I have ever known.” I bit back words of furry waiting for him to explain himself when he tells me that I only deleted it from his desktop but not from the computer.  Oh, well okay uhh I knew that. Yeah! I knew that all along. I was just yanking his chain. Duh!

 Here are some fun pictures from the other weekend when I went to Great Bend with Amanda to meet her parents:

I drove up to Manhattan tonight to spend some time with my brother and his room mates. I always think the drive is going to be unbearable but it never takes as long as I think. Anyways, Tanner and I went to the mall here and I would die to have half the stores in Salina that they have here. Hmm…lets see….they have Gap, Old Navy, American Eagle, Holister, Pac Sun, and Wet Seal. And what do we have? Rue 21, JC Penny’s, Sears, Dillards, and Payless. Our mall is disgusting if you ask me…a waste of rent space.

My week has been anything but relaxing and normal. It’s been an emotional roller coaster, a headache, and stressful. Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it. Is college worth it? Is my own apartment worth it? Is dating worth it? Is working as hard/much as I do worth it? Is moving worth it? What is my point? Why do things seem to work out when I don’t want it to but not work out when I do want it to?

I’m holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
I’m hearin what you say but I just can’t make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you’re sorry
Didn’t think I’d turn around, and say…

It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
I said it’s too late to apologize, it’s too late

I’d take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it’s nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it’s turning blue, and you say…
“Sorry” like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I’m afraid…

It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late
I said it’s too late to apologize, it’s too late

Apologize -One Republic

Anyways, that’s it from me in..

Manhattan.

GO K-STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE STREAK ENDED TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!

I am so stinkin’ frustrated! Today I only had my flip flops to wear and it was blizzarding outside so my toes literally froze (that was at 9:30am), I didn’t understand/do all my homework for that class, then I had to do a bunch of web design homework over my lunch break (10:30-1:45), I got to my last class late just to find out I forgot my glash drive so I had to run all the way home which made me over a half hour late for class. Now it’s past 3 and I’m grumpy, I have to work from 4:30- 11pm but I have a bunch of errands I need to do!!

Here’s my school schedule:

M-W-F:
9:30am - Literature and Society: The Image of American Indians in History, Song, and Film.
10:30am - Managerial Accounting

Tues.:
9:30 - Critical Thinking
2:30pm - Web Page Development

Thurs.:
9:30 - Critical Thinking
2:30pm - Web Page Development
5:30pm - Information Technology for Business

I swear I am always at school! Park a tent in the library because I’m staking residency. When I’m not at school I’m at work.

<html>

<head>
<!– Chemistry Classes Web Page
       Author: Jordan Moravek
       Date: 22 January 08
–>
<title>Mr. Dube’s Chemistry Classes</title>
</head>

<body>
<h1 style=”tech-align: center”>Mr. Dube’s Chemistry Classes</h1>
<h2 style=”tech-align: center”>at Robert Service High School</h2>
</body>

</html>

I have to do THAT for school. Any one care to tell me what the HECK I am doing?!?! I am so lost and it’s the second day of class…needless to say computer codes/tags are NOT my forte.

Too sexy for my shades.

I don’t care what you say or who you are…these papers are TOO cute.

This most important man in my life is turning 45 years old today. He’s a friend, a voice of wisdom, a mentor, a role model, and my father. During highschool I resented him but if I could I would take it all back. Every single day I would tell him how much I love him and how much he means to me. I would listen to what he tells me and practice what he preaches. I would know the importance of the advice he shared.
I thank God for his health and pray every day that he lives to give me away at my wedding, to hold my first born child, to enjoy his retirement and to own a red convertable. He deserves nothing but the best because he is the best.
I tell myself that the man I marry will be just like my dad: loving, patient, kind, compassionate, hard working, laid-back, happy, content, warm, smart, wise, and treats me like the love of his life and his little princess.
I love you, daddy.

I got off work early tonight! It feels so weird to be off before 11pm. wow. anyways just thought I’d give a little update and say that winter break is nearly over (and with it my life). I will be working 40hrs. a week plus 15 credit hours at Kansas State University. Yuck.

Click in the picture for a bigger view but this is me and my boyfriend Stacey.

and with it come thoughts of new resolutions. It has been said, “Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits.” Totally true. My “resolution” for this year is to get in shape. I’ve got new shoes, new work out videos, and new work out clothes but for what? After the first week they’ll probably be shoved into the back of my closet and instead of digging them out I’ll be digging in the fridge. I think everyone likes to think of what they could become and what they could accomplish but being handed things on a silver platter sounds sooo much more appealing. A quick fix to a new me isn’t going to happen. It will only be attained through sweat, blood, and tears…and through rain, sleet, and snow! Translation: I’m going to have to work for what I want. If I want to get in shape I’ve got to bust my butt. If I want to be successful in life I’ve got to bust my butt. If I want to finish college within the next 2 years I’ve got to bust my butt. Goals wouldn’t be goals if it wasn’t a challange to acheive it.

Christmas cards, Christmas cards, Christmas cards!! I made so many my mind is about to explode.

I am so ready to pack my car with all the gifts for my family and head over to my parents house. My family opens presents on Christmas Eve since we leave early on Christmas morning for my Aunt Mary’s house. I’m looking forward to the expressions on my little brothers faces when they open the gifts from me. They’re totally going to freak! Anyways, here’s a few pictures of some of the cards I’ve made.

We had a crazy as can be ice storm this week.

I had to scrapbook by candle light on Tuesday because during the WHOLE day the electricity was out. I’m going to be perfectly honest and say that I cannot live without electricity. I’m not a girlie girl so it’s not because I couldn’t see to do my hair or makeup. I adore my stereo and desk lamp. Without them both I am so lost. I guess God just thought it would be funny to watch me light a bunch of candles like I was worshiping a shrine to my desk and try to scrapbook.  
Anyways, even though I didn’t have power the Winter Wonderland outside my door was unbelievable. It took my breath away seeing the crystal ice hanging from low tree branches.

I was asked the other day: What does Christmas mean or symbolize to you?
My answer then wasn’t as clear as I know it is now. I’ve had time to think about it so here is my official answer…

Living on my own has proved difficult and lonely at times. Between paying my bills and going to college my stress level escalates more and more every day. I try to maintain a balance between work, play, school, and church but that fine line is ever harder to pin point. I find myself waking up in the morning and running non-stop until I lay myself down at night.  I find comfort in saying: Just make it through one more day, You do what you have to do so you can do what you want to do, and Another day another dollar but although those sayings bring only a very temporary sense of relief life never ceases to bring me to my knees with frustration and hardships. But going through obstacles like I have brings an ever better appreciation for my parents and for my family. I never thought my parents knew what they were doing but turns out they did. I never thought I would learn to dearly love my family in the way I have but I do. I never thought I would need such a close knit bond with my siblings but I could not live without it and it sustains me through thick and thin. So Christmas to me is about family and relief. Christmas allows for down time and family Christmas gatherings allow for much needed affection, communication, and togetherness. Feelings of warmth, fulfillment, love, happiness, contentment, and joy settles through me as I re-charge my family batteries throughout the time I spend with them. My family is not quick to judge, practices daily a vast amount of unconditional love, and will support me no matter what I do and no matter where I go. Christmas allows me a certain amount of release. I let go my daily schedule, deadlines, appointments, meetings, work, and stress and I trade it all in for one day of perfect love; love for not only my family but for Jesus Christ which are the two most essential ingredients that make up my life. It’s not about the physical gifts, Santa, or the magic in the air. It’s about the gift of love, Jesus Christ the son of the living God, and the magic I feel and know when I spend on my family the most valuable form of currency I know: Time.

I’m a little sad to learn that Hulk Hogan has been divorced by his wife. I guess it’s true…all good things must come to an end. I wasn’t a real big fan of his wrestling but I loved his TV show.

I’ve got myself another nine hour shift coming up at Target today. YUCK.

 All my flowers have officially died. I love winter because I love cold weather but I don’t like that everything beautiful has to die.

Latest project update: I’m in the middle of creating an ADORABLE planner scrapbook. I’ll post pictures as soon as I can but my gosh is it totally cute. Also, I’m still working on the Birthday Book project for Liz. It’s an album that has a page for every year up until 18 yrs. old. It’s hard to describe but I’ll put pictures of that on here soon too.

Arg…right now I’m smack dab in the middle of a huge paper that is due tomorrow for my supervisory management class. I’ve written 7 pages so far….it is so time to take a breather.

Last night Stace and I had an appointment at 6:30pm for a 15 minute time slot to get our pictures taken. That 15 minute time slot some how managed to turn itself in to a three hour event. It was absolutely ridiculous! We first got there and stood in line because a woman was picking up her developed pictures. Stace and I filled out a form and seated ourselves. After about 10 minutes we got the background selected and began talking about posses. There were different pictures hanging all over the walls of different posses we could try and Stacey quickly picked one out he liked. So here we are taking a couple pictures when the camera guy says his film is running low and we have two options…
1) Keep taking pictures but run the risk of losing them all if the film runs out or…
2) Let him go ahead and change the film but it may take a while.
Well to us this was a no brain-er. We wanted him to change the film! He said it would only take a bit but that little bit somehow turned in to over an hour. We finally thought we were in business and ready to take some more pictures when another woman showed up wanting to pick up her developed pictures. Twenty minutes later he finally starts taking our pictures again. We finish taking them and he begins to hand out forms to the two families waiting in line and then decides to start taking their pictures before letting us select which ones we would like to order. It only took ten minutes to pick out the pictures we wanted but he had to completely finish taking pictures of another family before he let us pick them out. It was stupid. I was outrages, impatient, and hungry. Stacey and I didn’t leave until after 9:00 when out appointment was at 6:30 and should’ve only taken 15-20 minutes.

*Deep breath* well I’d better get back to writing my paper…

Lord of Sea and Earth and Air,

Listen to the Pilot’s prayer –

Send him wind that’s steady and strong,

Grant that his engine sings the song

Of flawless tone, by which he knows

It shall not fail him where he goes;

Landing, gliding, in curve, half-roll –

Grant him, O Lord, a full control,

That he may learn in heights of Heaven

The rapture altitude has given,

That he shall know the joy they feel

Who ride Thy realms on Birds of Steel.

                                      –Cecil Roberts

Wow. Finals are sneaking up on me! So much to do and so little time. I’m starting to stress out about it. Yikes! It doesn’t help that I work 45 hrs. this week. It will be a miracle for me to finish these classes with decent grades. For the first quarter I was doing great and getting all A’s but now….well lets just say it’s gettin’ harder and harder every day to even care. It’s an accomplishment for me to make it to class. Thank goodness next semester, my last before attaining my Associates, I only have 100 level classes. It should be pretty simple. But for right now I just want to get through this semester. I keep thinking to myself that I only need to get through next week.

Anyways, Stace had his interview today…actually about 40 minutes ago. Hopefully all went well. I haven’t heard from him yet. Maybe no news is good news.

That, my friend, is what I am getting for Christmas. Be jealous.

It feel SO good knowing I have most of my Christmas shopping done!! I placed a few orders today and it is such a relief. Also, most of my homework assignments are done, all my laundry is clean, the dishwasher is started, my checks are in the bank, I’m almost done filling out the application for admittance to Washburn University, I’m meeting with my adviser today to finish enrolling, and I have a little bit more time before I go to work today to run a few errands. I feel much more organized. Last night I was worrying myself sick that I was so behind on everything. The beginning of this week I used for a little R & R so I paid for it last night and today by running around like a chicken without a head trying to get stuff done.

Anyways…Stace and I had to cancel our plans for our little photo shoot Thursday night since we’re so busy. It’s rescheduled again for next Wednesday. I’m stoked to have a good picture of us!! He hides whenever I try to snap a picture.

Well I better get back to my ‘To Do’ list. Slowly but surely it’s getting smaller and smaller…

Cameron, an friend of mine, came back from Marine boot camp on Monday. He spent about three months in California suffering through various forms of extreme physical exertion, no sleep, barely any food, and drill officers. We talked on the phone for about an hour last night and I don’t know how Marines do it. From some of the things he told me I would’ve given up. They make you do things you never thought humanly possible. Despite all of what he’s gone through he says, “I’m more of a man now than I ever was.” I’m proud of him. Ever since he was ten years old he walked, talked, slept, and ate anything that had to do with combat and special operations. He’s worked hard to achieve his dreams and he deserves nothing but the best. He still has a long ways to go as far as training and different deployments but he’s graduated as a Marine and holds his head up high when he calls himself one.

Last Wednesday we had the first snow of the season. It wasn’t much and the sun melted it within a couple hours but it was still beautiful!

Wow. Things have just been crazy insain. Finals are coming up and lots of end of the semester papers are coming due. Yikes! I have a paper where I have to interview someone and then write like 1o pages about it plus have at least 3 professionally written papers such as their job description or the rules and procedures papers. Stuff like that. It’s due next week and I haven’t even interviewed anyone! Arg. I cannot wait til finals are over.

Thanksgiving went really good. A couple aunts, uncles, and cousins came over to my parents house. It wasn’t a big production. But it was fun. These are my two little cousins, Maddy and Maverick. They’re were so adorable playing basketball. I tried to catch them when they weren’t paying attention but they both LOVE gettin their picture taken so every time I had it they automatically possed.

Last night Stace and I put up our Christmas tree! It was painful trying to get him in to the holiday spirit. He basically took everything out of it’s package and called it good. I couldn’t even get him to wrap my Christmas present! He got a little more festive towards the end of the decorating but I’m not sure if he ever had fun.

I still haven’t gotten another kitten yet. I sure miss Otis.

Anyways, I’ve got another class to get to. 

I regret to inform everyone that the very same kitten I got less than a week ago has passed on. Otis experienced a severe seizure which took his life on Monday night. Even thought I hardly knew you I miss you, kitty!

Oh the joys of Trick of Treating! I love it! I’m almost 20 and I still go! This year I drove to Hutch to go with a friend, Zac. It was a blast!!! For our costumes I layed out and taped together a bunch of 8.5″ x 11″ white cardstock papers and then traced a really funky looking circle to cut out. Then I cut a circle out of yellow cardstock and glued that to the middle. The finished product? AN EGG! We taped and pinned the paper to the front of our shirts and then went Trick or Treating!

There was one house that were giving out these adorable suckers with felt characters on them…

 So that was my Halloween! Zac and I got a bunch of weird but humored looks and lot and lots of candy!

Tiffany came over last night, after she got off work, for some good ‘ol gossip and boy did we have some doozies to talk about. That was much needed girl time. My days are filled with going to college at a primarily aviation/technology school, which is pretty much all men, and then going to work and dealing with dramatic women. It’s nice to come home and just laugh it up with a great friend who always has the skinny on the latest gossip.

My little brother spent the afternoon with me yesterday which was exciting for him but draining for me. I don’t know where little boys pack all their energy. He probably found most of his energy inside my candy bowl.  But never fear. I put it to good use. We did all my laundry, made lemonade, cleaned my apartment, unloaded and then loaded the dishwasher,  watched the same movie twice, went shopping for scrapbooking things, stopped by Maurice’s to visit Tiffany, and then went to church.

The funniest thing happened this morning…
Stacey is constantly telling me, “Never skip your classes because I don’t want you to have a GPA that makes you look like your dumb.” I’ve been on the receiving end of way too many lectures due to me skipping a class here and there so, needless to say, I never, ever tell him when/if I skip a class.
Well, this morning I was forced to skip a class. It was for a good reason so don’t worry. (I decided I needed to sleep in)  He flight instructs in the morning so I thought I was in the clear. He would be too busy to notice if I’d gone or not.
Without a worry, I was driving to school so I could make it to my second class and believe it or not Stacey calls me. No problem, I thought, I can fake that I’m walking to my next class. I answer the phone and we start talking and just as I was sweetly telling him I was walking to my next class HE PASSES ME ON CRAWFORD STREET.
Dang it. I’ve been had.
I start laughing because the pure humor of it was too much. I couldn’t hold it in. He lectured me for a bit and told me all about how I could mess up my future, I wont be able to get the job I want, and how he never missed classes while he was in college. Man, it was funny. 
I tried various excuses but he wouldn’t accept any of them. What a turd. I’m an adult and if I so choose to skip a class then so be it.

 Late for my next class….gotta jet

Alrighty, here is the latest project I am working on. There are still two incomplete pages that I’m waiting to fill with pictures so I haven’t photographed them yet.

Click on the photos on the left hand side bar to see more pictures.

I found a couple more CHA - Chicago pictures. I had a blast there. I can’t enlarge this picture any more because of such low resolution but hopefully you can sort of see them. If not then click on the picture and a bigger image will pop up. I’m in the middle and Danelle is on the right. 

My life is a little crazy right now and so is Stacey’s. He’s trying to get things paid off and financially stable before his student loans start coming in. He’s working to reduce his expenses and he’s even going to sell his truck! If you know me at all you know I am in love with his truck so I think him selling it is affecting me more than him. Soon I wont be able to drive it anymore so I’m getting in as much “Jordan/ sexy truck” time as I can. Sometimes I just want to give Stace a hug…he works so hard.  He has three jobs, I think he puts in around 50+ hours a week,  and he works 7 days out of the week. It’s hard sometimes. We used to go on dates, lounge around in sweat pants, and talk all the time. Now when we want to see each other we schedule to go grocery shopping together or one of us cooks dinner around midnight. We have 5 minute phone calls and say only what we need to and then it’s time to go.  I try to be patient, though, because I know this is just the stage in life that we’re at. School has been crazy for me. I’m having a hard time maintaining my straight A’s but I’m trying. I’ve got homework assignments every single day for every class. It wears me out, especially when I work until 11pm. Being this busy has really taught me some stuff. I appreciate the little things. When Stace and I do get to see each other our expressions aren’t so much verbal as they are physical…and not like romantic-physical but things like looking in to each others eyes, holding hands, or hugs. We put a lot more emotion in to those things because if we tried to say what we feel we’d run out of time. One look in his eyes tells me so much more than if he tried to tell me.

 Okay, enough mush. Zac is coming down tomorrow for his sisters wedding and I am so stoked to see him again. It’s been so long that I don’t even remember the last time I saw him. 8 months, maybe? Hmm…I don’t know. All I know is it’s been to darn long.

The hay rack ride is also this weekend but I have to forego that to attend the wedding with Zac. I’m a little sad that I’m missing it because that is the highlight of fall….which we all know is my favorite season. It’s gorgeous out there. It’s far out in the middle of no where with lots and lots of trees and fields. Purely beautiful. We have a hayrack ride, explore a couple caves (Yes! I said caves!), eat wonderful food, drink hot apple cider, play football, and talk until late in to the night. It’s a wonderful time.  But, there is always next year.

This is all for now. I must go to my next class!

What has this spectacular fall season have in store for me so far? My mother spent a day pampering herself and finally got some much needed attention. She got her hair cut at the stylist I recommended, bought a bunch of hair products, and splurged on a new outfit. Here is a picture of her with her new hair cut:

This past Sunday Tiff and I had the day off so we went to Capers’, a local coffee shop, sipped our beverages, and caught up on the latest gossip. Aftewards, her and I went to a beautiful park to take some pictures since the weather was just gorgeous. We walk the trails and got a little much needed exercise.